To my firstborn-my nephew

You lie there, oblivious to everything.
I lie here, smiling, crying, at the happiness that is to come.

There is warmth all around.
Remember this warmth all your life.
It is from the one 'person' who loves you unconditionally till her last breath.

I have known this 'person' all my life.
She helped me walk through it when I wobbled.
She lunged my confidence when the world put me down.
She cried when I cried.
She fed me when I had the whims for being fed by someone else.

When I was upset, she would pick the scooter and take me to the ice cream parlor.
She would hear me rant while i gorged on my sundae.
(No wonder, nothing beats sundaes as #1 my comfort food :P)
In those and many such other moments she rose from being my elder sister to being my friend.
(In fact she never liked me calling her didi, we were friends she would say.)

She is for me, an epitome of pure love. No malice, no cheats.
All my spoils have come from her. My first Ipod, my first branded wrist watch, my ray-bans, and much more.

She held me tight when we lost our elder sister.
I still remember that grip affirming to me she was there for me.
She still is holding it tight.

So always, always love her, respect her.
She will be your friend, guide and is your mother.

Much love munchkin,
Masi
22.06.2016

(P.S.: This is only the first of many more letter to come your way. Masi will smother you with louve. )

Those last few miles

The path in front of me is turning rusty and rough.

There are coarse stones under my feet.

My sole is gashed, so is my soul.

Bleeding, I walk ahead for the path leads me to my destination.

Mustering all the strength in me, I walk.

I am out of my stash of water.. food..strength..

I try to find him..to lean on him.

I see him struggle himself.

I steer into silence.

Placing faith in us, I keep walking.

Hoping the destination meets us before we fall over and the end reaches us.

Year of writing: 2016

The children know, so listen-in!

'The kids are not alright', is one of the episodes of the podcast series titled 'My Indian Life', a BBC Media initiative and hosted by Kalki Koechlin. All the previous five episodes have been intriguing and interesting too. This, however, touched a cord. It talks about child abuse, a paramount problem and makes for a poignant listen.

Well, while and after listening to it, my thoughts have just been going back and forth on whether to say it or not. More so acknowledge it to myself and shout out loud just so my soul would hear it. 
I was molested when I was young. Well, as is many a times, it was the friendly neighbor. I found my ways to avoid and ensure that it never occurs again. That's the small of it.

The reason I feel I need to speak out is put just two things out there:

To parents: Keep your arms, ears and eyes wide wide open. However your child, risque, rash or wayward, he or she, do not sideline your children's words when they speak of anything close to describing abuse. A child hardly understands good and bad, so unless you check out their claim, just don't disregard it. 

Second, it is happening to children, boys and girls. We, as a society make it even harder on boys to share and talk about abuse. Label it as a weakness. In fact, data shows that many men abused in their childhood become delinquents and abusers themselves. Abuse doesn't come with a gender tag. 

The path is very long but at the very least let's acknowledge, accept and report it. Only then can we pave way for victims to recover and find themselves, their voices, their strength. 

P.S.: Written originally in September of 2018.